


In Common

by ChokolatteJedi



Category: The Good Place (TV)
Genre: F/F, Snark, Yuletide Treat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 06:14:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13140768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChokolatteJedi/pseuds/ChokolatteJedi
Summary: The one where Eleanor and Tahani are soul mates





	In Common

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wickedwords](https://archiveofourown.org/users/wickedwords/gifts).



“Eleanor, this is your soul mate, Tahani.”

“Wowza hot mama!” Eleanor said, looking the other girl up and down. “I think I could learn to like it here,” she muttered.

“Excuse me?” Tahani returned the gesture, looking Eleanor up and down in turn. Then she grabbed Michael by the arm and dragged him all of six inches away. “This little garden gnome cannot be my soul mate. She barely comes up to my waist!” She turned back to Eleanor. “No offence.”

“Hey, Legs-for-days, us shorties have our uses!” Eleanor complained. “As _several_ members of the Phoenix Suns can attest.”

“Excuse me?” Tahani repeated, looking horrified, while Michael blushed.

“Uh, I think I’ll leave you two to get to know each other,” he mumbled, straightening his bow tie. “Oh, look, I think Harvey needs my help with the giraffe carousel!”

“So, is the problem that I’m short or that I’m a girl?” Eleanor asked bluntly. “Cause Michael said that soul mates aren’t dependent on our earthly bodies or something like that. I zoned out a little when I saw Gunner’s soulmate Chris without his shirt on. Woo! Daisy that boy is fine! I mean daisy. Daisy. What the fork?”

“Please stop it!” Tahani snapped. “You cannot curse here in the Good Place. Your words are automatically changed.”

“What? Why? That’s some bullshirt.” Eleanor complained. “What, some puddings can’t stand to hear the word daisy? What losers”

“For your information, some of us would rather not have to hear such coarse language in our eternal paradise,” Tahani informed her snippily. “I, for one, am quite happy about the curse filters.”

“Well I’m not,” Eleanor said, cocking her head. “I say, my paradise isn’t paradise if I can’t curse.”

“Well my paradise would not be paradise if I had to hear you curse.” Tahani snapped back. “If you’re so… _determined_ to say such things then maybe you belong somewhere else!”

“Woah!” Eleanor’s jaw dropped. “You can _not_ be my soulmate. I’m going to go find Michael and complain.”

“Maybe you should!”

“I just said I will!” Eleanor snapped back. As she stomped off, she muttered, at exactly the right volume for the other girl to overhear, “What a forking bench! And that fake accent!”

“I heard that!”

“I wanted you to!”

oOo

“I see your point,” Michael said thoughtfully. “We don’t want to disrupt the paradise of those who don’t want to hear cursing, but I never considered that some of you would _want_ to curse.”

“What can I say, its a stress reliever,” Eleanor shrugged.

“That makes sense,” Michael agreed. “Now, what if I was to tweak the translation system. The filter would be active for people around you, but _you_ would hear yourself saying the actual words.”

“That would be wonderful,” Eleanor said, as sincerely as she could. “It would make my experience so much better.”

“Well, that’s all that I want,” Michael replied brightly.

“Now, are you sure that Tahani is my soulmate?” she continued.

“Oh, quite sure,” Michael replied. “The matching system is never wrong. You two should have a lot in common.”

“Like what, exactly?”

“Well, you both have done so much to help the downtrodden people of the world. Your work with death row inmates and her fundraising for the Life Row Foundation means you should have plenty to talk about there. And of course, you’ve both worked with orphan groups around the world.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Eleanor waved her hand dismissively. “What about outside of our… work?”

“Oh. Well, uh... You both have a love of fun; her with her art and you with your clowns. I’m sure you’ll have a lot of joyful times exploring that. And of course there’s the part where you both love Jazz.”

“Oh. Of course we do.”

Michael grinned widely. “Now, I’m sure there are other things you’ll find you have in common as time goes on - those are just the major points I remember from the initial matching program - but you’ll have eternity forever to find those commonalities.”

Eleanor blinked. “Eternity? Fantastic. Well, thank you, Michael.”

“You’re always most welcome, Eleanor. Please, come see me any time.”

“I will do that.” Eleanor excused herself from the office, resolving to get a little froyo before she returned to her - shudder - clown-filled cottage, and her - double shudder - soul mate.

oOo

As the crooning strains of the jazz/rock fusion album filled her mansion, Tahani steeled herself. She had questioned Michael extensively about Eleanor, and he had assured her that they were indeed soulmates. What’s more, he told her several things that they had in common, and ways to break the ice. Many of her charitable pursuits had crossed paths with Eleanor’s work, and they certainly knew several of the same people. Tahani rarely did the actual dirty work of helping people, but the money she had raised had undoubtedly paid for the supplies that people like Eleanor used.

Then there was the art. She was indeed an artist, and Michael had assured her that Eleanor would appreciate her art - especially if she included clown themes and Scandinavian minimalism. Tahani wasn’t familiar with that particular theme, but she had never yet met an art style she couldn't handle. She wasn’t particularly fond of clowns herself, but if that was what it took to make her soulmate comfortable, Tahani would be accommodating. And if Eleanor’s favorite album was Kamilah’s bloody record, then Tahani would grit her teeth just as she had done her entire life and play it.

After all, she wanted Eleanor to feel welcome. If there was one thing Tahani knew, it was how to throw a welcome party, and she was pulling out all of the stops. Pictures of the people Eleanor had helped lined the walls, her favorite music was playing, and her favorite Thai food was spread on the banquet table. Tahani was prepared for anything.

oOo

Tahani was completely unprepared for a drunken Eleanor to begin berating Kamilah’s album for having too much jazz influence, ignore what should have been her favorite food for some leftover cocktail shrimp from Tahani’s ‘welcome to the neighborhood’ brunch, and then declare that her favorite children’s book was the illustrated kama sutra.

However, the few sips of gin that Tahani had taken before Eleanor’s arrival, to brace herself, meant that, when Eleanor changed the music to a heavy dance beat, she didn’t resist as much as she should.

And, much later that night, Tahani learned that Eleanor had been correct: there were several exciting uses for a shorter partner in bed, and they did have a lot more in common than she first thought.


End file.
